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what is the source of this (joy,freedom,exhilaration)? for if it leaves my job is to find it - if it grows stale I must be able to re-fresh it. Does it come from 'shrugging off the mortal coil' or caring for no-one but myself or being in such a lovely womb of creation or  HER balm of words, words, words. For now and future - amoral,immoral - mortal, immortal - conscience,conscious [A stream of conscienceness from an unconscionable corpse]

What were the results? If I won she is my responsibility (ever had one before?)   If I lost she is an amusement (just another one)   If still in limbo we are equals (seems passive BUT What IS an equal to/for G???)  Not the middle one - explore one and three.

Does anyone in this universe have toes but G? maybe jean has toes...

off to California